Front row seats sue church for discrimination
For too many years the front row of churches around the world has remained empty whilst the back row is jammed.
The front row has become the standing joke that pastors make, “there’s plenty of room down here at the front!” which elicits nervous laughter from the congregation but no actual change in their behaviour.
For some front rows this has become too much and they have started a class action lawsuit against the church.
“This is plain discrimination against these seats which were created equal in the sight of God,” stated their lawyer Jordan McKeeley, “to systematically shut them out of use and make them the butt of jokes is just unacceptable in this day and age.”
“Sadly this is typical of the bigoted behaviour we’ve come to expect from the church. These front row seats were made that way and the church needs to accept that.”
Campaign groups have made calls for churches to have their tax exempt status removed unless they show diversity of seat use.
Pastor Steve Hitchens rebuffed these calls, “Jesus was clear that the last rows would come first in the Kingdom. We are simply obeying our Lord and Saviour.”
Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible