Lego to Produce New Religious Figure: Jan Hus

The Lego® Group of Billund, Denmark, recently announced its new fall season releases, including the Protestant martyr Jan Hus, due in time for Reformation Day.

This move is recognized by toy industry insiders as a direct response to the astonishing success of Playmobil® with their Martin Luther figure, created for the 300th anniversary of the Reformation.

Dr. Brewster Johnston of Chicago Theological Seminary served as a consultant for the new plastic character representing Czech theologian Jan Hus.

Dr Johnston teaches the seminary’s most popular class, “Cartoons and Comics as Gateways to God,” considers this work “the highlight of my career.”

According to Johnston, “Hus beat Luther and Calvin to the punch. He earned his Papal Bull of excommunication a full century before Luther was condemned by the Pope.”

Hus, a Catholic priest who dissented from church errors, was burned at the stake when he traveled to a church council under the promise of safe conduct.

Lego is touting its newfound religious awareness. “Frankly,” said Lego CEO Malthe Olsen, “Playmobil, our perennial underdog, really caught us with our trousers down last year. as here in Denmark we don’t think about religion much. We used to be a Christian country, I think we were predominantly Protestant . . . or, was it Catholic…well it definitely was one of those two.”

Approval of the final rendition of Hus remains secret. One option shows him holding a goose, representative of his surname. Another, more controversial design, portrays him on the stake. “That’s the version I pitched,” says Dr. Johnston, “In fact, I think it would be even more historically accurate if the head and extremities of the figure are slightly melted.”

Playmobil CEO, Alois Schicklgruber, declined to comment directly on his competition’s impending release. He did, however, say, “Those foolish Danes have no idea of what’s waiting them. If they think Hus had his goose cooked, they will truly be burned when our new Foxe’s Book of Martyrs lineup is released!”

Reporter: Robert Charlesson