99% of people will just scroll past this article

Church Life

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Yes it’s true!  99% of Christians will just scroll on past this article and carry on with their lives as if nothing happened here.

The blood, sweat, and tears that we pour into writing these articles just spurned in favour of some pictures of cats.

How shallow!

But not you!

You’re special.

You are one of the 1% who took the time to come here and visit this humble website and read this article to see what it’s all about.

That makes us feel all squiggly inside.

Until about this point in the article.

Because it was about here that you began to suspect that maybe those 99% were right and this article is actually going nowhere.

But hold on!  You need to focus on the positive, as Joel Osteen exhorts us, you are special – you are the 1%, you are kind and thoughtful, …

OK, we admit it.

It’s a Sabbath and we’re taking a break from work but we think we can legalistically get away with writing drivel as it’s not really any effort…

But at least you had fun while you were.

You did have fun, didn’t you?

Oh please say yes…

*sniff sniff*

“Reporter”: John Spencer aka Not the Bible

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