Apple Watch 4 features “out-of-date” countdown timer


The Apple Watch 4 was announced on 12 September and is available for pre-order right now.

It boasts the same shape and screen display as the previous 3 models, together with the same specifications and apps as before.  However, this exciting upgrade comes with a different coloured strap.

And if that’s not enough to make you part with your hard-earned money, then it comes with an all-new countdown timer that lets you know when your series 4 Apple watch is superseded by the next model.

No longer do you need to worry about being out-of-date and missing out on spending more money on exactly the same watch but in another stylish new colour.

This countdown timer lets you know exactly when you’ll part with your cash.

Apple COO Jeff Williams stated, “Previously we used to just slow down the old Apple watch software with an ‘update’ so that customers would get so annoyed that they’d purchase the latest product but extensive testing has shown a klaxon alarm was over 1000% more effective.”

He continued, “We toyed with the watch announcing ‘unclean’ to let people know how unhip they were still using an old series watch, but the alarm reflects how we and our shareholders feel about people who don’t buy our latest model.”

The Apple watch 4 also received clearance from the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to be a safe way of eating money.

“Apple is now empowered to take more control of their buyers’ bank accounts,” said FDA Commissioner Scott Gottlieb in a statement.

The Apple Series 4 watch is available from ONLY $9,999 with part exchange offered for any family members sold into slavery.

Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible

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