Breaking News: Trump’s racist bone in his body found!


President Trump, denying his recent statement that four freshmen congresswomen of color was racist, said, “I don’t have a racist bone in my body.”

However, his recent presidential health check revealed this to be a lie – as the x-ray clearly showed that he does have a racist bone in his body despite his repeated denials.

Dr Simpson, the President’s physician, stated, “All 206 of Trump’s bones were found to be white.  It is my opinion that this is no mere coincidence but a symptom of white supremacy permeating his very being.”

The physical examination followed the President tweeting that four congress women of colour, who are now known as “The Squad”, should go back to countries they came from.

Jerry Falwell Jr., one of the people behind the New Revised Trump Version of the bible, has stated that President Trump was not being racist but was actually being like Jesus (despite the fact that the phrase, “go back where you came from,” and its derivatives has long been a trope of Racists and white supremacists) .

“God’s Chosen Vessel, President Trump, was suggesting that they go back into womb – hence go back to where you came from – that is to be born again.  When they are born again as a Republican then they will see the true light.”

Just to be sure all were clear about his position, the President made this statement, “I have nothing against people of colour. Some of them are very fine people. I think every white person should own one.”

Jerry Falwell Jr. responded once more, “People take this phrase out of context when they do they exegesis. President Trump is clearly referring to us being owned by Christ who is the (white) light of the world.”

However, Dr Simpson replied, “President Trump’s bones cry out to us otherwise!”

Reporter: Dr Parson Peeves and John Spencer aka Not the Bible 

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