Pokemon Millennial Edition: Search for offences
Nintendo released a new version of Pokémon will be available this month:
Unlike the original players will no longer be trying to catch various imaginary creatures but imaginary offences instead.
A spokesperson for the company had this to say, “We have included a whole range of offences for our players to be triggered including sexism, racism, classism, ableism, patriarchy, cultural appropriation and white privilege. The size of these offences range from microagressions up to full scale hate speech.”
Rather than lobbing a ball, players will lob insults and the game provides links to social media posts that they can troll.
As players progress they will gain more insults to attack with until they reach the heady heights of “bigot” or “Nazi”.
In addition, we can link online comments to the locations of their writers, so providing places for mobs of players to gather outside homes and businesses to protest.
We have, of course, provided safe spaces in various locations so that our Millennial players can recover before hunting their next offence.
There are cash prizes for those Millennials who find the most things to be offended by, however Nintendo has assured all players that they will receive participation trophies regardless.
Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible