The Salty Cee celebrates 1st birthday as Billy no mates

Yes it’s true!  Somehow we managed to scrape together enough content to disappoint readers for a whole year. 

When we started readers were full of such high hopes that we could be the new Babylon Bee until their lawyers issued a cease and desist order.  So we settled on a new name instead.

Ah, the buzz from people helping us choose our new name was shortly followed by the sound of tumbleweed.

We took the time today to review those heart-warming tweets from people who recommended us only to discover that they had subsequently unfollowed us.

We’re not mentioning any names, but suffice to say that we hope Tom reaps what he has sown.

Fortunately for us there is enough of a pool of people out there that we’ve got a good few more years before we run out of people to disappoint.

However, the better news is that research has shown that IQs are decreasing around the world and so we are hopefully that this will lead to slump in people’s standards which can only be beneficial for us in the long-term.

In the meantime we’re here on our lonesome or Billy no mates as we say in the UK (cue violins) writing this post to anyone who might take a wrong turn on the internet and end up here rather confused.

So let me clarify:

We’re been here a year, so by the law of averages something we’ve written in that time must have been considered funny by someone somewhere.

Thanks mum.

We thought now would be a good idea to put some of these “funny” articles in a book together with other stuff like biblical personal ads, predestin-o-scopes for Calvinists, gossip prayer requests, Christian puzzles and much less!

The book’s ready and we’d love to show you the cover but our designer is still trying to overcome their shame of agreeing to do it before they realised what they had signed up for.

But watch this space.

No not literally – we mean you’ll have to stick around to hear more details – yeah, sorry about the sticking around part – rest assured that the numbness you feel now will eventually pass.

If you’re on our mailing list then rest assured you’ll receive a free ecopy to say thank you for sticking around even if we did have to pay you.

Hey wait, why are you all unsubscribing?

 Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible