Country Music fans targeted by Chris Tomlin virus!

Church Life

With attentions focussed on the COVID virus, it was no surprise that other viruses have been sweeping the country, or more accurately sweeping country music, unnoticed.

The Chris Tomlin virus is, unsurprisingly, named after Chris Tomlin, the Grammy Award winning artist who also has a time unit named after him.

The first wave of this virus has resulted in a ‘surprise’ Country Music album with Chris Tomlin and contributors such as Florida George line (now renamed as Central Michigan to be more sensitive).

Symptoms include a loss in quality of music, ear ache and raising hands until they go numb.

Jim, the only person who we could find who would openly admit to liking Country Music, had this to say:

“Many of us had known for years how the Chris Tomlin virus had been affecting old hymns and reducing them to a parody of their former selves – but I just thought that it was because they were old and thus more susceptible to illness….”

“We also never expected this virus to jump from one species of music to another and so we hadn’t prepared for this unprecedented turn of events at all.”

The Center for Disease Control (CDC) recommends that Country Music fans socially distance themselves from the album “Chris Tomlin and Friends” and Country Music artists remain in isolation and thus avoid any such collaborations “for the foreseeable future”.

It remains to be seen whether this outbreak can be contained before it jumps to other music species such as death metal.

Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible 

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