Duke and Duchess of Sussex to step back from everything except privilege

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex announced on Friday that they would step back from their role senior royals to carve out a “progressive new role”.

Details of this progressive role have been revealed to involve keeping their royal titles, their grace and favour home in Frogmore and their salary but stepping back from their duties, lack of privacy and hard work.

“It was a tricky decision to pursue our own personal interests rather than those of Great Britain, but this is a role that we feel we were born to. It’s long past time that the monarchy was pulled into the modern celebrity age and used their royal titles to pursue sponsorship deals and branded goods. I mean no-one should have to work into their nineties like the Queen.”

Our political commentator stated, “Some have criticised Harry and Meghan of being unsupportive of the Queen but their joint statement clearly says that will ‘collaborate with Her Majesty the Queen’ and the two hours’ notice they gave her before issuing their statement shows just how serious they are about this.”

Harry’s brother Prince William is very supportive, “We’re more than happy to pick up the slack while they step back and have fun.”

If only more families could be like this our children would be just so much happier.

Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible