Low Court Decides Fate of Hitchhiking in Frivolous Case


With racism and hitchhiking being hot topics these days, another lawsuit looms over the lowest court in Clarke County, Georgia (the smallest county in the state).

Since everything offends everyone, this story captures just how discriminatory people can be with their so-called “innocent” comments.

For years, the term “green thumb” has been used to describe those who have an affinity for gardening and plants, but after the ruling is official, you had better be prepared to change your vocabulary!

The head court guy, judge, whatever, struck his hammer thingy on his desk and declared, “Whereas, by the power invested in me by the great state of Georgia, I hereby declare it to be illegal to call someone a ‘green thumb’.”

The reasoning for this decision is based on a single case of a hitchhiker who claimed it was racist to those who thumbed their way from place to place.

When asked how upset he was, the anonymous (but brave) man said that the term “green thumb” excludes all hitchhikers who have other-colored thumbs.

In his case, his thumb was of the “tan” persuasion, therefore causing him to take issue with the fact that he doesn’t have a green thumb.

There you have it!

So, if you were led to believe that your hard-earned tax dollars are being wasted on pointless legal disputes, we at the Salty Cee can confirm that you are right.

The high court used the legal term “hogwash” to describe its lack of interest in this case, causing it to default to a “make-believe court” that might eventually make it on the local evening news; or at least page 32 of the bi-weekly newspaper.

We would like to urge all of our readers to think twice before praising an avid gardener for a job well done by exclaiming, “Wow, you sure have a green thumb!”

That is blatant racism and we will not stand for it!

Stop and smell the roses; people don’t really have green thumbs (with the exception of the Incredible Hulk and Gumby).

Reporter: Angry Nursery Worker

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