National Emergency Leads to More Golf

President Donald Trump declared a national emergency for the border wall even though the estimated number of unauthorized immigrants in the US has declined slightly in the last decade.  For some odd reason, lower numbers call for an emergency, while higher numbers do not. Some have suggested that this must be some kind of common core math equation. 

To stress the urgency of the situation, President Trump has installed a $50,000 video golf game to help him expand his “executive time.” Perhaps there is some kind of metaphor in this. Opposition from a DFL and resistance from within GOP may be seen as some kind of sand trap for border wall funding.

A White House insider said Trump hopes the video game may help things get to “the green.” Others are simply seeing an ever increasing divot in the national debt. Trump is just hoping the new golf simulator with help his rather large handicap in the game.

Reporter: Dr Parson Peeves