Waiters to ask political affiliation before service


Following the unfortunate incident with Sarah Sanders at the Red Hen restaurant and also with Kirstjen Nielsen at a Mexican restaurant last week, a law is being rushed through congress to make it a requirement for waiters and waitresses to ask customers their political affiliation before service.

“In this world people shouldn’t have to serve customers who hold different political beliefs,” stated Jim Crow, “the best way we can achieve that is to have segregation built into our service industry.”

Reaction has been mixed with some hailing the “trigger free environments” an advance in progressivism whereas others are concerned about the inherent bigotry this law enshrines.

Jim Crow responded, “There are provisions for race, sex, sexual orientation and gender identity in the Civil Right Act and Equality Act but nothing in there says we have to treat our political opponents equally.”

Proponents of the law state that in time restaurants will have to choose to cater either for Democrats or Republicans and clearly display whom their restaurant caters for on their website and in their window:

“This is far better than those barbaric segregation laws where you would see those you hated eating in the same restaurant.  This avoids the problem of having to encounter those with different beliefs at all, which will be a much more pleasant experience for all.”

Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible

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