Shock as Christian offers to pray and then follows through

 The Christian world is still reeling after hearing about a Christian who a offered to pray for someone and then actually did it.

It was after an unremarkable service at third Baptist church in Kingston, Massachusetts when one believer confided in another that she were struggling with a certain issue. We won’t mention Agnes’ name here to protect her identity nor will we mention this sensitive issue, even though we think that piles is nothing to be ashamed of.

However, rather than the second believer promising to pray for Agnes and then forgetting about it they actually prayed.

Pastor Jim Hill stated, “I was shocked. In all my years as a pastor I’ve never heard of such a thing. Offering to pray for someone is just one of those phrases you utter as a nicety and has been since the days of Moses.”

“It’s like when a disaster happens and you say ‘My thoughts and prayers are with you.’ It doesn’t actually mean anything other than a brief ‘oh dear’ before you continue scrolling through your social media feed.”

Agnes herself was stunned when she found out, “I never expected this to happen. It would be like me asking ‘How are you?’ and the person saying something other than ‘fine’. I feel like my personal space has been violated.”

Theologian and scholar Dr Edward Smith warned, “This kind of behavior has always led down a slippery slope to real Christian living. If this were continue then there’s no telling where the church might be – I mean God might take notice of the prayers and mess up our happy place.”

Despite these stern warnings our reporter was prepared to try this out for themselves. However, every person that they talked to at church has said that they’re doing fine.

Reporter: The lonely rogue