Disappointed Consumers Attempt to Return New Year


Many consumers have launched a mass effort to return 2019 after just a short time living in it. The argument and reason for their anger is that 2019 looks almost identical to 2018.

Many people had anticipated a much brighter future, but after seeing the influx of credit card bills, along with the dreaded task of taking down all the Christmas decorations, they would like to return it.

Experts have been unable to pinpoint the proper method to do this, and the best they could arrive at is selling 2018 calendars on clearance to bring a bit of nostalgia to the new year.

This mentality has been widely propagated by disgruntled millennials who expected the world to bow to their every whim, when in fact, they have to return to work immediately following New Year’s Day.

Since no one is stupid enough to attempt to serve God with a lawsuit, the motto for 2019 is going to be “You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit!”

Happy New Year everyone!

Reporter: Angry Nursery Worker

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