K-Love Premium: One whole extra song in playlist!


K Love shocked the Christian community last year by increasing its playlist to include 10 songs instead of the usual 8.

Despite the uproar and predictions that the apocalypse was imminent, the only reported side effect was the hospitalisation of Mrs Miggins who experienced mild concussion after falling and striking her head on her bible book stand after hearing the news.

Well, K Love CEO Mike Novak has recently announced K Love Premium – a service without those annoying ads.

“I know it’s quite shocking that listeners who like repetitiveness could possibly not want to hear the same old ads, but we’ve always been at the cutting edge of Christian media,” says Novak.

“By cutting the ads we reckon we can squeeze in a whole extra song in our playlist, making it an astonishing 11 like Spinal Tap’s amps!”

Novak punches the air before realising that he has referenced a rather dubious music mockumentary with language wholly unsuitable for the Christian population at large.

Red-faced, he adds, “What I meant was that it’s like more than 10, which is pretty awesome.”

Our reporter is keen to know whether they have reached too high but only time will tell if 11 songs can cause the same headache as 10.

Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible 

Image credit: Memes For Jesus

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