In a Desperate Attempt to Stay Relevant, Salty Cee Writer Interviews Himself
Friends, we have an exclusive interview for you! Probably because no-one else was interested – but we digress.
Today, we interview one of our reporters, The Lonely Rogue.
Yes, that’s right, we are interviewing ourselves! And in no way is this a desperate attempt by us to stay relevant as the Cee gets ready to close its doors…
Oh no, we would never do that.
Except that we might.
Salty Cee: So how long have you worked for the Cee?
Reporter: About two years now. Time flies when you’re making fun.
SC: And technically, am I not you and therefore, interviewing myself?
Reporter: Technically.
SC: So this is a self-satire then?
Reporter: Technically…
SC: Only a pretentious douchebag would want to do that.
Reporter: Excuse me?
SC: What were some of your favorite articles on the Cee?
Reporter: My favorites?! Well, there was the time we reported John Hagee’s 2020 predictions which, ended up being 100% accurate.
SC: Interesting.
Reporter: Then there was the time I noted that a Christian blogger’s cliché brought peace upon all lands.
SC: Things have been calm ever since. What was the first thing you did for the Cee?
Reporter: At first I wrote a letter to Crass Christian asking for employment advice.
SC: Did anything come out of that?
Reporter: Just my realization that the Cee would actually respond to me, whereas other Christian parody sites might not. But if you want the “big” Christian site to respond to you, you have to heed the advice of our published submission guide.
SC: More of a service for writers than a parody. We’re running out of time, any other articles that you consider to be unforgettable?
Reporter: Definitely Epstein’s posthumous statement or when the Libertarian’s nominated a mannequin.
SC: And with that, our/my time is up. It was a pleasure to interview me. Good luck to…“us” with the Damascus Dropbear!
Reporter: The lonely rogue